I logged out of my Instagram today and plan on limiting my activity on it. Logging out of social media meant me logging out of everyone else’s life. I was starting to compare my life to others and comparing how I look to other women. Social media isn’t the only way that a person can put themselves down, also our own personal obstacles. In between all of this, women become overwhelmed and start to limit themselves. I know I do!
I hold myself to high standards and knowing that I was comparing myself to other people made me feel less beautiful. It made me less confident and it led me down the road of self-destruction. My mind was filled with what I could do and be rather than what I am doing now.
I turned on Beautiful by Christina Aguilera and started singing and dancing and all that I was worried about was gone. My mind became clear.
Nothing in this life will be easy, we will cry, laugh, scream and be silent. What you do to get over that wall is what defines you. There’s more than one way over a wall! Remember that!
We learn after our hard times what it means to love ourselves whole heartedly and how important it is to look in the mirror and say to yourself, “You are beautiful.”
Thinking positive thoughts enhances self-love and confidence. See how I told you that I was comparing myself, those thoughts resulted in me feeling less confident. I put down the phone and did things that made me feel beautiful and competent.
Thinking positive is not easy! With everything we as women go through already, positive thinking takes a lot of discipline. Your body regenerates itself with new cells creating new thinking and new habits.
Practice positive thinking and start doing things that make you feel like you are enough. If you think you can change the world, you probably will be the one to do it. Put your social media to rest and appreciate what’s here, right now, in front of you.
There’s nothing better than maturing and knowing that you are enough. All that you have is what the Creator gave you. Nothing more and nothing less.
You are what the creator made you to be and that’s perfection. You are no mistake and the mistakes that you do make, help you become the person you were meant to become.
Think of this when you’ve hit a wall, I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. That helps me not stress myself with where I am in life. Instead of us encouraging women to be and act what they see on reality shows, we should be encouraging our women to love what they see first. Then love what you do and carry yourself with dignity and know that no one can take that away from you.
Trust yourself and work hard. Life gives no promises; all that the universe recognizes is your energy. You give out good energy, you will be given exactly what you give out.
To achieve even the smallest of goals, and to get through life's daily duties and responsibilities, you have to have some self-confidence. The importance of developing a self-confident attitude allows you to wade through the push and pull of different voices and opinions telling you, "yes, no, maybe, do this, do that", etc. Relying on other people to guide you and following their opinions robs you of your individuality, makes you unsure of yourself and can lead to depression.
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Self-confidence is an attitude that you hold about yourself that allows you to move forward and achieve your goals. An article on self-confidence from the counseling center at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign defines self-confidence as having a positive attitude, but with realistic views. They note that a self-confident person has a general sense of control of her own life, and can do what she wishes, plans and expects. Self-confidence means that even if things don't go your way, you still believe that eventually, somehow, some way, they will.
The University of Illinois article notes that your parents may have instilled self-confidence in you by encouraging self-reliance and giving you love even when you made mistakes. If you did not have your parents' help, you can accomplish this yourself. Anthony Robbins states in his book, "Awaken the Giant Within," that developing his confidence comes from mastering his ability to feel certain that he really could achieve something. His rule is, "If I decide to be confident, then I'll feel that way toward anything, and my confidence will help me succeed."
Sitting quietly with your eyes closed and mentally visualizing yourself in great detail as a confident person is a great way to start being confident. In his book, "Unleash the Champion," Denny Dicke says that visualizing is the most effective tool for building confidence and belief. After repeatedly visualizing yourself being and acting confident, and achieving what you wish by confidently going after it, Dicke notes that when it does come time to move with confidence, you will act confidently because your mind sees this as familiar ground.
There are several strategies to overcoming those negative thoughts that keep you trapped in lack of confidence. The University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign article cites four tips. First, emphasize strengths by giving yourself credit. Second, take risks by looking at new experiences as a chance to learn, not win or lose. Third, use self-talk by stopping in the middle of a negative thought, and reframing it with a positive thought or words. Fourth self-evaluation allows you to gain a stronger sense of self, and stop giving away your personal power to others.
Becoming self-confident does not mean you are unrealistic about yourself and your situation. You understand that you are not Superman, but being confident means still moving forward toward your goal achievement and desires even when things don't seem to be going your way. Using positive self-talk such as that of 1992 Olympic gold medal winner in singles tennis, Jennifer Capriati who said to herself, "I can do this! I am the best!", can really help get you through times of doubt, and help you to maintain that feeling of self-confidence.
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